Idiot of the Week is brought to us today by my good friend N.M., who recently had his credit card information stolen:
Someone stole my account information (he obviously didn’t realize I’m poor) two days ago, and tried to ring up a bunch of shit. He was probably so embarrassed when the card kept getting declined (because it was already maxed out). I hope the line behind him was long. I pictured him fumbling through his wallet and explaining to the cashier how this never happens and he must have forgotten to pay his bill – all while nervously glancing over his shoulder at the increasingly long and angry line dying for their lattes. Haha what a fool. My dad even felt bad for him, and I quote, “He picked the worst person in the world to rob.” I can think of worse people (I’ve seen Slum Dog Millionaire), but I laughed with him.
I even wrote a review for one of the places he went:
Since this thief didn’t steal N.M.’s actual credit cards, just the numbers, I am wondering how he paid for his dinner at a restaurant like this. Did he write the numbers down on a scrap of paper and hand them to the waiter when the check came? That is usually a red flag…but hey for a 23% tip maybe I’d look the other way too.
Is Everyone an Idiot but Me? 
Oh that’s classic and serves the thief right.
haha I agree! Thanks for commenting!
What’s wrong with people?
I wish I knew… instead I’ll just settle for complaining about them
Maybe the guy (or girl? Why do we always assume it’s a guy? That’s just sexist! But c’mon. We all know it was a guy) made his own Mastercard or Visa with paper, crayons and scissors. Except he is a lousy speller and wrote: Mastir Card (or Veesa) and that tipped the waitress off … who was an idiot too … but then she saw the tip and said nothing.
Haha that would be Priceless. It could have been a girl. It’s tough but sometimes you just gotta pick a gender and go with it. Can’t say ‘they’ to be gender neutral because that is grammatically incorrect and saying ‘he or she’ takes too long. Can English just get a gender neutral third person singular pronoun already?
s/he? Nahhh. Then you have the him/her issue. I’ll have to think of a gender neutral third person singular pronoun (GNTPSP) …
haha